Fight against depression: Battle won

Waking up to dream coming true is all a fairy tale. Working to make your dream come into life is the only way to live a content and happy life. It’s not that everything we wish for is the goal, but the path we chose to make us always remain hopeful is what matters most.

I did the same; living in darkness inside a shell does not allow me to see the ray of hope that shines at me every day. I never made an effort to bring out the best in me. Rather I kept on pushing into a comfort zone that finally led me to blame myself for the failures I faced till day.  The failure to stand up for myself, the failure to be happy, the failure to see the art in everything I do. As they say “better late than never”, things came a bit late to me. I realised that I was doing all these things out of my own will then being happy would be my will not that someone else will provide me the happiness. I will find happiness myself rather than expecting it from others.

Lesson 1: Happiness

Happiness is the form of life, never stay from it. Best is to hold the key to your happiness within thy self. Now you might wonder how I did all these. Well I learnt this important lesson from my kid, yes she is the best teacher for me so far. It is always said that parents are the best teachers, but I differ to say that kids are the best teachers life can offer.  Parents teach us to go with the flow of the life, while our kids teach us how to fight against it and stand up for yourself. Kids don’t need fancy items to be happy they are always contented even with empty carton that you wanted to throw away as garbage, true it is. They only know how to find the hidden form of satisfaction out of everything small or big. I also learnt to live my life from my kid.

Lesson 2: Appreciation

Everyday I used to wake up to that thought as to how much work is to be done for that day, how much cleaning what else is pending. But now I don’t do that anymore, even if the house is dirty I don’t mind at all. As I have both heart brain and heart cleared off the burden from the previous day. Everyday has its out turmoil and pain. But it’s not good to carry on the same for next. The more it builds up the heavier it is for you to get rid of it. To wake up to better morning is to have peaceful sleep. Leave the past walk to the best days ahead of it. I know am using a lot of best here, believe me the word best gives the deepest of energy from within. All that was past and now I wake up to look myself at mirror and say “damn it how can you look so beautiful each and every day”. Well this is what my daughter does, but is her own way. She needs to look at herself every day before she is off to school only to feel that her day will be as beautiful as her. Yes another lesson I learnt is to appreciate myself and feel beautiful.

I started to look out of those comfortable pyjamas, it’s important to dress up. When I started doing this first person to appreciate the changes was her, she walks up to me place a kiss on my cheek and said mom you look so pretty I want to be like you when I grow up. I was overjoyed to hear her say so, I wanted to hear this again and every day. Well you may call me selfish, but all of us need appreciation and when your near and dear ones does what more can you ask for.

Lesson 3: Set right example.

Every time the little one had something wrong she would come up to me, she knew that am the only one who will help her out. Any issue it could be her lost eraser or the pain of her bleeding knee when she fell off the cycle, she knew I will have solution and also best remedy to ease her pain. These made me understand that kids first look out for parents(mothers mostly) to understand and help them out during their painful time. So it was important for me to set the right example that I can fight any kind of situation in life be it a small or toughest of all, handling with patience and smile always on my face is crucial. Kids always watch us and follow our footsteps. For example when I was struggling with health issue doctors had advice me to workout but for several reasons I had pushed it, but when I forced myself to start work out step bye step on regular basis she knew I have decided to fight it all. She started exercising with me as well and yes exercising had been real fun ever since. Now on any day I miss/delay she say why aren’t you exercising today, don’t be lazy health is important, yes am surprised when she talks like an adult. This is just one example she has been part of many such hurdles I faced so far.

Lesson 4: You are not superhuman.

You are a normal human just like everyone else, you have both ups and downs don’t be afraid to fall down. It makes you stronger than you were yesterday. Never hide your emotions, mostly when you feel low it’s good to talk to someone how bad you feel about it. It’s ok to be hurt, when it pains you know your endurance level. That is when you shine up to find that hidden brightness within. When I fight with the man if it ends up on good note its fine, but most of the time argument turns sour and in the moment of heat when he speaks up unexpected things that hurt me. This time I have 2 options to keep it for myself and let the anger build up or break down, cry and let the anger flow in the form of tears. It’s ok to cry in front of your kids they will know that even you feel the pain, but what you do after you have cried enough makes a bigger impact. It’s ok to cry out when you find it real difficult, but then after you are done crying gather yourself up get fresh apply that special lipstick look into mirror and say yes I can face it nothing is tougher than me not even this situation, the little one now knows you are the strongest person, yes she knows that.

Lesson 5: Talk to someone.

I know this must be the first step, but no all the previous steps mentioned gives you the courage to talk about your issues. Talking out does not mean to tell your problem to everyone around, no find that one person whom you can confide upon. Even if that person cannot solve your problem still must have patience to listen to you, must encourage you to talk openly but never share this information to anyone else. Find one such person and pour out all your insecurities and sure if that person does not give you any suggestions but will stand by you at all times. I found this comfort with my friend, who never questioned about anything I said it all right, wrong, good and bad only thing was to hear me out and when I wanted to cry allowed me to do so. This helped me so much that I trust this person more that myself now. Even today when I need to share a secret I share it with my friend only and that person is my safe box now and forever. It is a great deal to find such person, once you find always treasure them never let them go. If required please take professional help if you are unable find that person whom you think can understand you, go to a psychiatrist and find a way out to talk.

Lesson 6: trust yourself.

Final and crucial lesson learnt is to trust myself always. I may not be correct every time, but I need to have faith in myself that even if I do no achieve success out of anything I do at least I will learn some lesson. And even if fail I will be able to stand up with more knowledge than previous to face all the challenges ahead. Never put yourself down easily, as humans we have tendency to absorb negativity more that the positive energy around us. So it is necessary to keep reminding over selves that even if outcome is not good enough still you will outshine it next time.  Accept your failure with dignity and work hard for the success. It will help you in the long run, never back up.

Life is never fair, but it is always beautiful. You just need to be open enough to see the beauty in everyone and everything around you. It is only then that life gives you all the reasons to be happy. 

With this note I end this series of how my friend( who was mentioned as I all the while) came out of depression. I hope this has let you understand how she did work on insecurities to come of it and continue to have peaceful life.